Weight Wednesday | Week 7

So! Ive recently looked online and apparently the best time to weight yourself is a Wednesday… Experts have found this out some how. So I’m guessing I have my weight days on the right day.

This week I have still kept up with the weights! Im finding it so fun just because I can really feel the difference! My partners sisters kids love it when I swing them around in a bucket, I normally die half way through and my arms are normally dead but this week it was amazing because I didn’t suffer while doing it! I will admit after a little while I was in pain but it took double as long for that to happen this time. It was an amazing feeling because I could do it for longer which meant the kids had fun for longer. I hate the thought of me and my partner having kids and me not being able to do anything with them because of me getting bigger or getting lazier so it really made me realise that I need to work at this a lot more so that I could be even better because of being a lot fitter.

Ive also realised that I don’t drink, I don’t drink at all. I did start buying a 2 litre bottle of water so that it would encourage me to drink more but that didn’t help. The thing is is I go all day without drink and then at night I down loads because I’m so thirsty! Then I always end up getting up in the night because now my bladder is full unlike all day. I know that drinking 2 litres of water a day helps weight loss so much! I used to drink 2 litres a day and I lost over 6 pounds and that was without even changing my diet, that was purely just drinking more water. I do really want to get more into a routine of drinking I think it would help with my weight loss so much!

Foot is a big issue, I went to the shop the other day and when I got home I realised I had about 3 cakes and desserts to eat. Thats just ridiculous and whats even more ridiculous is that I ate each one. I go to the shop and see so many things that I fancy and I buy everyone I don’t think oh I have this one already, I think I can have one of those and one of those. Its so bad but I know that I’m doing it which is more annoying because I could stop myself if I tried hard enough. I love strawberries and things like that so I don’t know why I don’t just have that instead of a cake if I want something sweet. Im going to make that a goal for this week is that if I want something sweet, I have one not 4 or 5 cakes. My partner also stopped me from eating 2 chocolate bars the other night, I really wanted it but it was about half an hour before going to bed so its like why did I want to eat something nice when I could eat it tomorrow way more before going to bed. I need to just get used to not eating everything all at once and spreading it out more.

Im going to bring back the weight chart next week! Im really going to focus more on my food because I’m going to be working next week so this week I will loose weight! There is no doubt about that!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

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Meditation Monday | Week 7

This week I’m focusing more on self care. I know I’ve spoken about it before but I want to share in more detail what I do to help me when my mood is a bit lower and decide to focus on my self care.

I don’t think self care Is really thought about this day and age, I think people just throw on a tv show and chill out which is part of it but to me a way of making yourself is a lot more than just to watch tv for a few hours. To some people that might be enough though so who am I to say! But maybe if we all took a bit longer on ourselves we could feel better for longer.

To start off with I take more care time on my body, I really enjoy a really good bath. I always throw in a bath bomb and lie back, sometimes I enjoy reading a book but other times I just enjoy lying there and doing a 10 min meditation or how ever long I feel. I also throw on a face mask so that my skin can clear up abit, when I get stressed I always break out in so many spots so putting on a facemark really helps. Just spending time on my skin and how my muscles feel really helps towards feeling better in myself.

I also enjoy watching some tv, not a lot but just some while I enjoy a hot cup of chocolate. I love making a big old cup of coco with whip cream and marshmallows. I recently discovered white hot chocolate and its amazing! Its like milky bar but liquidized. Ive recently been watching Game of Thrones and Sex and the city so I love snuggling up with my partner and watching a few episodes.

Ive also started drawing so that something I enjoy doing when I’m lower, even when I’m completely fine I just enjoy sitting there and drawing. I love just randomly drawing things, one of my fave things to draw is mountains and camps. I don’t know why I just really appeals to me drawing those things, its so random. I also like drawing people, I don’t draw them like normal people do but I’ve realised that people get drawing types and I know that this one is mine.

Another part of self care for me is that I like making the area around me more tidy, its silly to think that changing your environment could change your mood so much but it really helps me. I like it when its really tidy I can just see things clearer, Im not looking around for something I want because I can find it easy because I put it away properly. Its just when I have everything organised and even my diary organised I know what I’m doing and when it just makes me so calm!

Do you have anything you do for self care? Are some of these things what you do? Let me know in the comments.

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Mistakes I Made Being A Vegetarian

Ive been a vegetarian for almost 6 years now and I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way, so I thought I would share some of those things with you just in case you were thinking of making the lifestyle change of becoming a vegetarian!

The reason why I became a vegetarian was firstly as a bet that me and my friend couldn’t last, but before that I had never really been a big fan of meat as it was. I never ate fish because I hated the way they were killed so why was I eating cows and pigs etc as their killed in just as bad of a way. I think a reason I never did go vegetarian was because I didn’t want to add the stress to my parents but going vegetarian for a week they were really supportive of it, and was really interested in buying all the Quorn products for me. Its all strange after that for me I just remember thinking whats the point in going back to eating meat, I had lost bit of weight after changing my diet so I thought it was great. I think I thought that the weight would carry on coming off which obviously won’t happen unless I stop eating chocolate aswell.

So before I had changed my food habits I never really looked into what would happen with not eating meat, before changing my diet I never really ate any other vegetables but sweetcorn. This was one of my main problems that I never realised would damage my health. Basically you need to eat foods that make up for not eating meat to make sure your body is getting enough protein etc. I never did that and I just took meat out of my diet and carried on as normal. It was a couple of years and I ended up getting really depressed and felt so fatigued, I went to the doctor and they ran some blood tests and it turned out I had anaemia and a vitamin b12 deficiency. I ended up having to take 4 tablets everyday and had to go to the doctors every other day for injections to get my body back up to where it should be on the vitamin scale. It took a long time to get better. I sat there with the doctor and he explained that if I didn’t change my diet it would just end up coming back and it might end up that I can’t be a vegetarian because my body will keep getting unwell because I’m not replacing what my body is missing. I never changed my diet and this year I ended up getting a vitamin d deficiency, I was so annoyed at myself, it wasn’t mainly to do with me being vegetarian but it can contribute to it happening. I have made it a big change in my life now as I’ve realised that after getting unwell again if I don’t change I’m going to have to stop being a vegetarian as I’m damaging my health. I know its not being a vegetarian that has made me have these problems its because I haven’t lived a very good vegetarian diet so I haven’t given my body the things I needs. These past few months are going to be a big change for me as it could end up in big changes.

Another thing that I’ve gone wrong with is that I stopped checking certain packages after a while, most things I do admit I check. After a while you do just remember what is and what isn’t but I was eating super noodles the chicken flavour and it turned out that they changed the ingredients and they were not vegetarian any more. But I never checked over and over because they were at one point. When I found out I was so annoyed at myself! I knew that I should always check just in case they had changed the ingredients but thats just me! I get lazy at some things. I will say now I check things all the time just in case they have changed the ingredients.

Being a vegetarian is such a great lifestyle change to make. Vegans have kind of taken over I think (not going against vegans) but some have made it an annoying person thing, and its kind of become a joke for some people because of the way some vegans are. I think people forget that they can also be vegetarian if they didn’t want to make a massive change. I have thought about going vegan before but with the way that I am over being a vegetarian I can’t imagine what would happen to my body if I tried to be a vegan. Its a very nice thing thinking everyday you are saving those few animals. I have never regretted being a vegetarian, some people just make mistakes with the change and I was one of them! So if your thinking of making that change make sure you do your research first as to what you need to eat/ take to replace what your missing out on!

Have you made mistakes with being a vegetarian? Are you thinking of making the change?

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Weight Wednesday | Week Six

So this week has been strange! Ive really been trying, food wise isn’t that great which ill get too in a moment, but exercise wise! I think I’m getting there. Recently I’ve got a new job so I’ve really been focusing on getting my exercise up again so that when I get into work again I’m not absolutely killed by the work.

I got my partner to get the weights out of the shed and I’ve been working on them all week. Lifting has been great, I haven’t ached afterwards which is what I have normally done. That was one of the most annoying things about working out, I would work out really good and get into the routine but then I would start to hurt which would mean it would put me off of working out again because I felt like I needed to rest my muscles but I don’t think you have to do that. I think if you work out right and not over do it and stretch out after I don’t think you end up hurting as much after. Also I think even if I hurt I should still carry on right because that means its working? I also washed the car which might not seem like a “workout” but to me it really was! Them squats really took it out of my legs and my whole entire body! I was in agony for a couple of days after with my legs, but at the same time as hurting it felt good because I knew that I had done some work on my muscles. I still don’t think I’m ready to do a workout dvd just yet, even though I do really need to before working but I’m glad I’ve finally started using my muscles that I thought had died somewhere 6 months ago.

Food wise is difficult, Ive realised when I’ve kept myself busy I don’t have a problem with food, I don’t think about it and I don’t eat it but as soon as I get bored. I eat, and I eat a lot.  Its just annoying because I can go a few hours without eating and nearly wait till the next meal but as soon as I finish what I’m doing thats it, I eat loads and then I’m not as hungry for my meal at night. I feel like as soon as I’m in work my attitude towards food will be so different, I won’t have time to snack and ill have to wait until the next meal. I can’t wait because I feel like its going to help me so much. Hopefully the next couple of weeks I can rain it in bit though just so I’m not starving at work because I’m used to having snacks at certain times.

Within the next week or so I do want to bring back actually putting in what I weight etc. I think even if I put on weight its still good to talk about it and what I need to do to change the weight gain.

This ones another shortish one but hopefully it will get longer!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Meditation Monday | Week 6

This week has been great!

I had a job interview this week and I was very scared. After the last time I had one and my mood change I was scared that it would happen again and maybe this time I would struggle to get back up but nope! I got the job, its a job that I’ve tried to study for in school before and failed because of my mental health but now I finally have the job I’ve always wanted!

My head space has completely changed, I’ve been down in Bristol for nearly a year and its been great because I’m with my partner so I feel good but not having a job really stressed me out even when I would meditate and do some self care, life has just been stressful since leaving my job that I got the first time I came down, but I know that was for the best. I finally feel settled and ready to start my adult life, even though its scary.

I have a few weeks leading up to actually starting my job so Im going to plan out my time a lot these weeks, Im going to plan my blogs out so I can be pre prepared so I have no stress of not posting and spend some time on preparing my mind for starting a new job, I’m quite scared ill be honest because I really do want to enjoy it. I also want to spend some time exercising.  Ive been looking into yoga, I really want to start it and I have done it before and loved it! I only stopped because I got busy with work but I really want to get into it again. I want to be more flexible and be able to move around better, I feel like my body has 0 flexibility so that really needs to be worked on.

Ive been seeing around Fearne cottons book about calm. I really want to check it out as I feel like it would be a great read, it also comes with a few companion books that you can write in so I think I’m going to get that this week and focus on that next week maybe. I recently purchased a book called ‘the little bullet book’ It doesn’t have any author or anything but I got it from sainsburys it was around £5. Its a little book that has pages planned out for writing down what you need to do on certain days etc. It also has pages for goals that you want to achieve, its all different like a wheel page where you write how you want to balance out your life, with exercise and work life. It even encourages you to save money! Ive found it so great to have a book to plan out all different things for myself, even long term goals I want to achieve. I really would suggest grabbing a copy of this book if you see it!

I know my posts have been bit short these past few but I am working on creating more content!

What do you do to help you get organised? Have you tried yoga before? Did you find it fun? Let me know in the comments below!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

How Im Getting More Organised In 2018

Everyones the same when it comes to getting organised! Most people are rubbish at it. Ive spent most of my adult life trying to get organised and I’ve failed a lot of the time. This year I have made it my main goal to get organised so I feel less stressed.

In 2017 I started this blog thinking that I would get really organised and plan out loads of blogs, that never happened and for most of the year I failed to upload. This made me really sad because as I mentioned in meditation Monday last week I love blogging and I find it very relaxing. So the fact that I couldn’t get organised enough that I found time to do it every week annoyed me. So at the end of December I sat down and I spent a whole day planning my blog, planning what I wanted to do every week/month. It was a lot of work but I’m so happy that its all planned out so I don’t have to worry about that every week. I also know what I’m doing with my time when it comes to blogging.

Another thing I’m doing to get more organised this year is making a plan for cleaning/tidying. I know this sounds so basic and something that someone my age should have organised by now, or shouldn’t even need to organise but the truth it I don’t have it organised. Im 22 and I still can’t remember that things need hoovering, or dusting. I really want to get into more of a routine before moving out into our own home just because if I can’t remember to do it with just having two rooms to do how am I going to cope when I have a whole house?! So this year I’ve made a plan for a day each week that the hoovering, dusting and tidying will get done.

For Christmas my mum and dad bought me a really nice diary from paper chase! This year I wanted to use a diary to plan out everyday so I knew what I was doing and I could be more productive rather than a day just slipping by. I’ve also put all the birthdays in it, I’ve even wrote in there when the cards need to be sent so I can remember and not forget like I did last year and ended up sending them 5 days after there birthday because stupid Facebook reminded me. I think diaries are underrated now, I don’t think people use them as much as they should, there also good to write how you feel so you can keep a track and also so you can look back to what you were doing on that day.

Ive made plans for food the week before loads of times but this year I’ve already started to really plan meal plans, Like what I’m even eating for breakfast and lunch. Purely because on the day of food I always rush to put something together because I had no idea what I was having. Also I eat more crap because I didn’t plan out what was ok for me to eat or not. Its so much better to have it all planned so I have a little bag of snacks ready to know what is for that day. Its also really going to help with my weight loss so thats always a plus!

So thats how I’m getting organised In 2018! Let me know how your getting organised in 2018! Have you already got it planned how your getting organised?

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Weight Wednesday | Week Five

Im not sure about weight Wednesdays anymore, Im not getting better with the whole eating situation and my exercise Is basically non existent. I just don’t want to keep creating these posts with them not going anywhere, I really hoped this year I would be a lot better and I’m just not for some reason. The way that I’m going to do it is give a few more blogs but if it doesn’t get better I’m going to give up.

As this week I haven’t been to great I’m not going to focus on my weight. I’m going to talk about the craze that I’ve been seeing on youtube. Its a dieting trick called fasting. Fasting is where sometimes you go days without food or it could be a time frame in the day where you ban yourself from eating. Basically what it does is burns fat, our body fast at night anyway, its where the body goes without eating so it enters into ketosis. Ketosis stars when you run out of carbohydrates to burn so it burns the fat to make up for it. Basically what happens when you diet but it burns it quicker.

I watched one video on youtube where the guy didn’t eat for a whole week and lost about 10 pounds, and then all of a sudden there was a billion videos of these people ‘fasting’. To me it just looks like a way to form an eating disorder surely? I can partly understand the whole don’t eat for the certain hours of a day because that should be what its like anyway, I mean not everybody’s life revolves around food like mine does, but going for a whole week or a few days without food is surely dangerous and bad for the mental health. Every time I’ve not let myself eat for a certain amount of time I’ve binged, so it would be completely pointless.

Ill be honest it does appeal to me, but I already have issues with my feeling towards food and problems with my vitamins etc. I also just feel like its not a long term solution to a big problem of mine. I might try going a few hours without allowing myself food that would be the only possible way I would do it, just to get me out of the routine of eating most of the time. I just don’t think its good for you physically or mentally.

I know this blog post was a lot shorter than normal but I just wanted to talk about fasting and how I feel about it . My aim for the week to come is to get working out and feeling better.

What are your views on fasting? Have you tried fasting? Has it worked for you?

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Meditation Monday | Week Five

So! This week has been strange in the way of my mood. It hasn’t been great. Im not depressed or anything like that I’m just angry. Angry all the time. I don’t know why all this anger has just come over me and it was really difficult to control. It was ending up in arguments with people and I kept blaming it on other people but then I realised it was actually me starting these conflicts with people.

Its so much easier finding out whats wrong and knowing what I would have to sort out rather than just having arguments and wondering why people kept arguing with me, but at the same time even finding out what was wrong it is not easy to change quickly when needed. I used to have an anger problem all the time when I was younger even before being a teenager, and when I say an anger problem I mean I big horrible ugly anger problem. Since going through treatment and getting older it got better, I do get it every now and then and sometimes worse than others. I normally notice is straight away and sort it out before it gets really bad but this time sadly I didn’t. Now I knew there was things I could do to get better, so that was what I did!

Firstly I started with not going on my phone as often, which was what my goal was for this week anyway I just needed to do it straight away and not put it off, it was great just sitting there talking to my partner and not reading any negative things or just disconnecting from the world, I was fully in the moment and didn’t think about what was going on else where. Secondly I started reading again, me and my partner realised that when I stop reading more often I start to get stressed so reading was the first thing that popped into my head when I realised my mood was bad, I just love reading and it makes me feel good just finishing a book it gives me something small to aim for which is really nice. Lastly I just needed to chill out and realise life doesn’t have to be stressful it only has to be if you make it which was what I was doing. Ever since I’ve realised that I didn’t need to be stressed life was so much clearer and I didn’t have to worry about finding a job or worrying about my views etc. Life is what you make it.

This week I have also really enjoyed drawing, I said last week I wanted to draw more as it made me happy so I did! I like my little collection of drawings, its nice to look back at them and its also nice to do them. I won’t lie I hate it when I can’t draw something right but Its nice in the end when I like the way the drawing looks and I’m proud of it. I really want to try painting! It wouldn’t give me hand cramp and it would just be fun to just paint random things, I would love to see what my mind would come out with.

So still for my aim is to start meditating again as I feel like that would help me a lot with whats going on, and also make me calmer just in general in life.

Do you get angry? How do you help your brain to stay calm?

Heres to a calmer week!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

My One Year Blogging Anniversary!

Ive been blogging for a year! I can’t believe its been this long, it really only feels like yesterday! I know last year I was so terrible at posting! I had so many ideas I wanted to get across but had no plan to do them. Before the year was up I realised that I really needed to kick my but into gear and work harder on this blog as It was something that I always loved.

I have always felt like this blog was my little baby, I’ve always wanted to use this blog as kind of a journal for myself so I could write what I wanted too and talk about how I feel when it comes to my mental health. Having people actually viewing it and following this page is a massive bonus because It means I can talk to other people about things! Ive wrote quite a few posts on this page last year and I just want to talk about some of my fave ones!

One of my all time faves was my ‘Being a plus size girl’ post, that was the first time I had ever spoken truthfully about how my weight was affecting me in day to day life, and my partner told me he had sneakily read it and it made him cry. It was one emotional blog for me to write but I loved writing it as it really gave me something to look back on to motivate myself to do better (even though I’m still struggling) Im not sure if any of my family members have read it as no one has ever said anything about it so I guess I will never know!

Another blog that I loved writing was ‘Finding out I don’t have cancer’ I really got out how I felt about it all, and it was nice to share it with other people to show that its really stupid to leave it, I like to make some posts that could affect someone and this was definitely one of them. Even though I spoke to my partner about how I felt about it all it was nice to get it down onto paper and really say how I felt. It was a really hard time in my life and now I have that post to go back to too show myself that I can be a strong person even if I feel like I’m not .

Last but definitely not least was my ‘ Why can’t we all get along’ post. It was a post that I had wrote when I was really emotional and upset about the Manchester attack, It was about half 11 at night if I can remember and I was listening to kill them with kindness by Selena Gomez and it really got me upset. So I just thought it was the perfect time to open the laptop and just write, and just write about what was going on in my head at the time. I thought it would make a great blog post because it was just raw, I didn’t edit it or change anything In the morning when I looked back at it I just released it and I loved it and still do.

This year is all ready to go and there will be a billion more posts than this year and I’m so ready for it so I hope you guys are! This blog has all my thoughts on it, open for everybody to see. I love this blog and I love you guys!

Were there any posts that you enjoyed on my blog? How long have you been following for? Let me know in the comments below!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Weight Wednesday | Week Four

Now.

Ive tried this week! Ive really tried, I will be honest I did have some chocolate. But normally I would eat a lot more than I normally would. Ive also eaten really well I’ve had eggs and spinach. Also when my partner had pizza I had quiche and salad. Im having very light meals like pasta and wraps so I wasn’t eating really heavy oily foods, and I’ve still put on weight.

Normally I wait until the end to say wether I’ve put on weight or not but this week I’m so annoyed I couldn’t wait because I needed to get a moan out. Ive eaten so well and I’ve still put on weight. I have also been out for walks this week, and I’ve still put on weight. This is when it happens and I just get that I’m not interested in loosing weight because when I try it ends up that nothing comes off and I get annoyed. Its really horrible to go through all the effort and it not benefit me in any way, because obviously its not helping my body because I haven’t lost any weight. Even exercising doesn’t get it off.

I have had my thyroid checked before and even recently and its all ok, nothings wrong so thats even more annoying because theres not a reason behind it. I just want to know the reason for when I try it still doesn’t come off. Its just really disheartening to really try and nothing still come off. When I see that I’ve put on weight it just makes me not want to carry on trying, this happens every time and I really don’t want to give up this time but if I keep trying and nothing happens I just can’t see the point when I could be eating really nice pizza instead and still weigh the same.

On another note, I want to talk about the walk that I went on the other day with my partner. We were sitting around not knowing what to do being all bored, and I just said lets go on a walk. My partner knows places to walk around here because of when he was younger so we walked a really nice walk and ended up at the end of it having a view of all of pill and it was so nice! We walked at night so all the lights were on and it looked amazing. It was really nice going out for a walk together instead of sitting there and watching tv, it made the time we spent together a lot better because we could talk instead of facing the tv.

I love walking and I really want to do it more!

Im not going to do a weight chart this week just purely because I’ve put on weight and I’m not sure on how to do a chart with that. Im going to still post these and then when I’ve lost weight I will post them!

Much Love

Amy

xxx