How Im Getting More Organised In 2018

Everyones the same when it comes to getting organised! Most people are rubbish at it. Ive spent most of my adult life trying to get organised and I’ve failed a lot of the time. This year I have made it my main goal to get organised so I feel less stressed.

In 2017 I started this blog thinking that I would get really organised and plan out loads of blogs, that never happened and for most of the year I failed to upload. This made me really sad because as I mentioned in meditation Monday last week I love blogging and I find it very relaxing. So the fact that I couldn’t get organised enough that I found time to do it every week annoyed me. So at the end of December I sat down and I spent a whole day planning my blog, planning what I wanted to do every week/month. It was a lot of work but I’m so happy that its all planned out so I don’t have to worry about that every week. I also know what I’m doing with my time when it comes to blogging.

Another thing I’m doing to get more organised this year is making a plan for cleaning/tidying. I know this sounds so basic and something that someone my age should have organised by now, or shouldn’t even need to organise but the truth it I don’t have it organised. Im 22 and I still can’t remember that things need hoovering, or dusting. I really want to get into more of a routine before moving out into our own home just because if I can’t remember to do it with just having two rooms to do how am I going to cope when I have a whole house?! So this year I’ve made a plan for a day each week that the hoovering, dusting and tidying will get done.

For Christmas my mum and dad bought me a really nice diary from paper chase! This year I wanted to use a diary to plan out everyday so I knew what I was doing and I could be more productive rather than a day just slipping by. I’ve also put all the birthdays in it, I’ve even wrote in there when the cards need to be sent so I can remember and not forget like I did last year and ended up sending them 5 days after there birthday because stupid Facebook reminded me. I think diaries are underrated now, I don’t think people use them as much as they should, there also good to write how you feel so you can keep a track and also so you can look back to what you were doing on that day.

Ive made plans for food the week before loads of times but this year I’ve already started to really plan meal plans, Like what I’m even eating for breakfast and lunch. Purely because on the day of food I always rush to put something together because I had no idea what I was having. Also I eat more crap because I didn’t plan out what was ok for me to eat or not. Its so much better to have it all planned so I have a little bag of snacks ready to know what is for that day. Its also really going to help with my weight loss so thats always a plus!

So thats how I’m getting organised In 2018! Let me know how your getting organised in 2018! Have you already got it planned how your getting organised?

Much Love

Amy

xxx

Advertisements

My One Year Blogging Anniversary!

Ive been blogging for a year! I can’t believe its been this long, it really only feels like yesterday! I know last year I was so terrible at posting! I had so many ideas I wanted to get across but had no plan to do them. Before the year was up I realised that I really needed to kick my but into gear and work harder on this blog as It was something that I always loved.

I have always felt like this blog was my little baby, I’ve always wanted to use this blog as kind of a journal for myself so I could write what I wanted too and talk about how I feel when it comes to my mental health. Having people actually viewing it and following this page is a massive bonus because It means I can talk to other people about things! Ive wrote quite a few posts on this page last year and I just want to talk about some of my fave ones!

One of my all time faves was my ‘Being a plus size girl’ post, that was the first time I had ever spoken truthfully about how my weight was affecting me in day to day life, and my partner told me he had sneakily read it and it made him cry. It was one emotional blog for me to write but I loved writing it as it really gave me something to look back on to motivate myself to do better (even though I’m still struggling) Im not sure if any of my family members have read it as no one has ever said anything about it so I guess I will never know!

Another blog that I loved writing was ‘Finding out I don’t have cancer’ I really got out how I felt about it all, and it was nice to share it with other people to show that its really stupid to leave it, I like to make some posts that could affect someone and this was definitely one of them. Even though I spoke to my partner about how I felt about it all it was nice to get it down onto paper and really say how I felt. It was a really hard time in my life and now I have that post to go back to too show myself that I can be a strong person even if I feel like I’m not .

Last but definitely not least was my ‘ Why can’t we all get along’ post. It was a post that I had wrote when I was really emotional and upset about the Manchester attack, It was about half 11 at night if I can remember and I was listening to kill them with kindness by Selena Gomez and it really got me upset. So I just thought it was the perfect time to open the laptop and just write, and just write about what was going on in my head at the time. I thought it would make a great blog post because it was just raw, I didn’t edit it or change anything In the morning when I looked back at it I just released it and I loved it and still do.

This year is all ready to go and there will be a billion more posts than this year and I’m so ready for it so I hope you guys are! This blog has all my thoughts on it, open for everybody to see. I love this blog and I love you guys!

Were there any posts that you enjoyed on my blog? How long have you been following for? Let me know in the comments below!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

What I Learnt In 2017

This year as been such a whirlwind for me! Ive gone through so much and I’ve also done so much! Ive moved away from home, Got Engaged, I got out of a job that made me very unhappy sometimes, I’ve also had a lot of stress but 2017 but it has been one year that I have learnt so much!

Growing Up Happens Quickly

Even though I felt like I’ve been grown up for years it was this year that I really felt the most grown up, obviously I moved away from home this year so that was a massive step in my life. I left the job that I had for 3 years and made the move. That was so scary but it made me realise that I really had to grow up and make some big decisions in my life without the help of my parents.

Don’t sign anything without thinking about it or reading it. 

This year I signed up for an agency, during signing all the paperwork I agreed to sign a paper saying that if any damages happened, I would pay for them. I had a car accident and ended up damaging two cars. This also led to me signing another piece of paper that had the description of the damages on and the paper meant that I agreed that it was me. At the time it was dark and I didn’t fully see what the damages was, so basically I signed something without even looking at the damages. After looking back I really should of took the time out and said hang on let me process it but I didn’t and ended up really messing myself up. When signing things you really need to read it all through, think about it and make sure your not screwing yourself over. I now always ask what I’m signing.

You have to make Decisions by yourself sometimes.

Normally all throughout my life I’ve always asked people what I should do, and they’ve always told me and Ive always gone with there opinion. Recently while moving away from home and moving into a different family I’ve realised that no everyone is going to make decisions for you. Sometimes you really have to grow up and make some decisions for yourself. Thats been quite hard for me as I think that was my way of trying not to handle to consequences of what ever decision I had made. It does make life harder sometimes but at the same time makes me feel stronger every choice.

You don’t always need medication to get better. 

Ive suffered with depression most of my teenage and young adult life. After moving down to Bristol and suffering with it more I realised that I didn’t have to go on medication to make myself better. At the end of the day I don’t think depression ever goes away and I think you have to learn to live with it, which is what I have done. I no longer think I’m feeling bad I need to go back on medication, I think I’m not feeling too great so lets spend some time on self care and make myself feel better. Im not saying that you don’t need medication for depression, I think you need medication when you have got to the lowest low, and when your ready to try life again without that help I think its easy to learn what makes you feel better in yourself.

Letting go of grudges Is good for you.

I have had a friend that I hadn’t talked too in probably over 2 years, and this year I decided that I wanted to talk to them again. The reason why I held a grudge over them was because of them not coming to a concert with me a few years ago, at the time I thought that they had lied about it and messed me about and they might have, I will never know because Ive just let go of it. After moving away from home this year and getting engaged I realised that was being stupid holding a grudge on someone over something so silly when they had been such a good friend to me at some point. I really felt like I was missing something with them and felt like I was being stupid about it. So this year I reached out to an old friend and forgave them. It was one of the best ways to end 2017 I think. Sometimes (not all the time ) you really do need to let go of grudges and move on, if not you miss out on that person being in your life.

Ive really loved 2017 , I feel like it had really made me grow up and move on from my past that I have held onto for so long. Ive learnt and grew so much. It was hard as somethings were stressful. I really do feel like 2018 will be a really good year!

What has been your highlights of 2017? Do you feel like you grew up and learnt lessons in 2017? Let me know in the comments!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

My New Years Resolutions and Goals

Even though 2017 was great I want to make 2018 the best one yet!

Here are some of my New Years resolutions and Goals that I want to share with you guys and maybe inspire you to do that same for some of them!

Firstly I want to find a job that I love and want to stay in. I quit my job back in September due to reasons you will find out in a blog later on and since then I’ve been on the hunt for a job that I feel like I would love. Me and my partner are saving up to buy a house and I would love to be in a job I love so we can really settle in with life together. I have always been in a job I haven’t really been 100% on and thats a goal I’ve wanted for a long time, I want a job I don’t feel stressed in and one that I really feel comfortable in.

I want to finish my SPX Makeup course. I payed for this online course over a year ago now and I’ve been wanting to finish It for a long time. I would love a job in SPX but I know there very difficult to come by so just having that qualification would be great for me as its something I’ve always been so interested and invested in that I would love to work more towards getting that finished.

I want to meet up with friends more. After moving down to Bristol I’ve really lost contact with some friends I always used to be around. Ive recently got in contact with and old friend and I really want to meet up with them more. Its really different meeting up with a friend and being away from family and your partner, Even though I love them all dearly sometimes you just want a change of scenery and a different type of conversation.  I know its longer for me to travel but I feel like it would really help with my mental health and the way that I feel about life, so I would really feel like I’m making the most out of my life with making more memories.

I want to feel more better about my health and have more of a positive life with my health. I do have life issues when it comes to my weight, I can’t play around with the kids for long because I end up half dead, I struggle to move around in bed, I feel tired just by going out for a couple of hours. This year I really want to feel healthier and be healthier. Im sick and tired of struggling day to day and thats why I really want to work harder on myself to make life better and longer for myself.

I really want to create and plan and stick to it with blogging. I always make a plan that I would love to do each week/month when it comes to blogging and I always give up because think its so stressful when really I’m just not using my time to its most use. I love blogging and I love just sitting here and writing so why shouldn’t I do it more?! Ive nearly been blogging on here for about a year now and I could of had so many more posts and a bigger online family if I wasn’t so lazy!

I would love to read more books, In 2017 I really got into reading books and I loved it. I stopped reading them because I found that I didn’t have time and I went on my phone instead. This year I really want to put my phone down and pick up a book more. I always find that I don’t get angry and stressed as often so somehow I think it really helps me calm down and relax more. I also have loads of books to get through and read!

I would love to know what your New Years resolutions are! Let me know in the comments below or link me to your own blog!

Much Love and heres to another really good year!

Amy

xx

Finding out I Don’t have Cancer.

I wasn’t sure on wether or not to make this blog, but I have a lot of things I want to say and I feel like some of what I have to say might help people!

About a year ago I found a lump in my breast. It was the day before my 21st Birthday and I was devastated. My first thought that went through my head is that I didn’t want some stranger feeling my boobs. Thinking back thats one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever thought! It was a stupid excuse that I kept on too for the past year. Until about a month ago when I really realised how serious it was. I had left it for a year and It never changed in size and that but I had gained more of these lumps more around my boob. Thats when I started to worry more . I decided that I needed to grow up and actually go to the doctor about it. My Nan had cancer twice so it was quite a big deal to leave it as Im at more of a risk. I phoned up the doctors and made an appointment which was in two weeks, and those were the most difficult two weeks.

I went to the doctor on my own, I was so worried and freaked out before I went in, I haven’t gotten my boobs out in front of anyone in years only my partner. So this was a massive deal for me. I got in there and the doctor ” had a feel”. The doctor explained to me that she didn’t think that it would be cancer just because of me having them for over a year so that was when I was less panicked! But she did refer me to a breast clinic to have a proper scan.

The scan was within a week and luckily my family managed to get time off to come with me. This was the appointment that would be the most important. I got to the hospital and got my boobs out again for someone else. They gave me a proper scan over and took pictures etc, and she told me that it wasn’t cancer. I got outside the hospital and me and my mum just started crying. Ill be honest part of me was relived and then part of my felt like it was and that she hadn’t done enough tests on it and that but after talking multiple times with my mum she reassured me that the doctor wouldn’t of sent me off if she had thought It was something more. After that I couldn’t stop smiling and it was one of the best moments of my life.

All the time within being tested and being told was one of the most difficult time of my life. When theres this possibility that you could have something so awful everything was going through my head, like was this going to be my last Christmas or who would my partner end up having kids with and all things like that. Luckily I didn’t have to Carry on thinking that, even though the help and medication that you get now would probably mean that I wouldn’t of died, those thoughts still go through your mind. I cant even imagine what it would be like for the people that end up having cancer.

I will say I don’t think its out there enough of how to feel your breasts, your never taught how to feel your boobs, or never told what is normal and not normal, I’ve found most things out from online which if some younger adults or actual adults don’t have access to the internet, I don’t think it would be easy to find this information. I really do think information should be more accessible.

I am one lucky person

Much Love

Amy

xxx

5 Things Im Grateful For

Hello!

Now I know that thanksgiving is originally an American tradition holiday, but every year on that day I do like to think of the things I’m grateful for, as everyone should! I don’t think people take enough time to stand back and think about how lucky they are in life. These are my top 10 things I’m grateful for!

Family

I love my family to pieces. No matter how many times they might annoy me or I might annoy them, I know that I will always appreciate them and what they have done for me. They have all had to put up with so much rubbish while I was growing up so It was be difficult for me not to be grateful! They have picked me back up so many times I’ve lost count, and I know that they would still do the same, I always hate telling them when I’m unwell because I know that they will worry, but its still really nice knowing that they do because I know that they really care. I know I never really tell them enough and I wish I would.

Friends

I know that I don’t have a lot of friends, and over the years I’ve really come to realise that I really doesn’t matter. Ive always thought it was Quantity over Quality but that has really become clear to me over the past year with moving away. I have two main friends in my life and I wouldn’t be here without them, lord knows I’ve put Kerrie through some tough times while growing up and no matter how much of an idiot I was she always stayed being my friend. Even Bud, even though I’ve moved further away she always makes me feel like I’ve never left (128 Days Snapchat Streak) we have always kept in contact and thats something I appreciate!

My Love

My partner has been one of the best things that have happened to me. When growing up you always say how much you love this person and that person but when you grow up you really do realise what love is. He can wind me up so much that I sometimes hate him. But I can’t hate him for more than 5 seconds. Theres just something between us that means that we can’t stay mad at each other and thats something so special to me. He always picks me up when I’m down and always finds a way to make life easier. Ive moved away from my family for this guy and I don’t regret it any day.

My Health

Now I am not the healthiest person as you can tell by my blog, so everyday I’m grateful that I have lived another day, this might sound dramatic but to me thats how I feel everyday. I do have anaemia and vitamin deficiency’s but everyday I am thankful that I don’t have anything worse. The same for my family, my family have been quite lucky with not having anything worse, nobody is perfect in health but to me still getting through everyday is enough.

Food and Shelter

A lot of people in this world don’t have food and shelter. Everyday I am thankful for the food that I am able to eat, I sometimes moan that I don’t want this or that but at the end of the day some people don’t have anything so to have food on my plate everyday Im always thankful, Some people also live out on the streets everyday and I’ve always been in the position that I have had money to make sure that I don’t. The thought of being out on the streets at Christmas in the cold is horrible so I can’t imagine what It must be like for those people, sometimes not even having company.

I know this blog post wasn’t a very long one, I don’t want to keep you from your friends and family if your celebrating Thanksgiving!

What are you grateful for? What are you doing this Thanksgiving? Do you celebrate Thanksgiving where you are even though its an American tradition?

Make sure to leave me a comment on this post, on my inter gram or on my twitter!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

A Little Weight Update Again…

Weight loss has always been an issue for me, I’m not going to go too much into detail about this just because I’ve spoken about this before on my blog. I keep having a bad attitude towards food. Ive realised today that I’ve eaten so much just because I’m bored. Im currently unemployed again which obviously means I’m going to get bored. But this time I literally don’t stop eating which is so bad! I have put on weight again since leaving my last Job because I don’t walk half as much as I did. Im not exercising or eating healthy and I feel like this is a recurring thing on my blog, which I’m sorry for as I know people want to see people do well but honestly. Its a struggle, I’m someone with a binge eating disorder and I’ve realised how big of a thing it is in my life. Ive just never taken notice of it before until now. One of my excuses for not wanting to loose weight is just because I don’t want the flappy skin afterwards but I’m just now realising how stupid of an excuse it is!

I feel like weight is always going to be a problem for me, its probably not the best attitude to have but I just feel like I have and always will. I know this is going to be the hardest change I have to make in my life. I think even moving away from home was easier for me, but I’m just coming to the realisation that my weight is too much now. I have to do something about it before its too late. I enjoy working out so I don’t know why I don’t do it more.

I am going to be bringing back weight Wednesdays for the 3rd time! Im not going to do it as continuing weeks just because I don’t feel the need too and then when I do have a break its not working out which week and then its not legit because it wasn’t done from week 1, so I feel like the blog posts will be better being done just as a weight Wednesday!

I am going to be starting that this week, and a blog post will be up next week for weight Wednesday!

Have you got any tips on how to stick at weight loss? Any good diet plans? Let me know in the comments!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

World Mental Health Day 2017

Hi guys!

This blog is a little less put together and is more of a ramble post. Today is World Mental Health day! Today hopefully a lot of donations and awareness will be made towards mental health and that makes me extremely happy.

Ive made a post previously about my depression ( make sure you check that out). But mental health day covers all types of mental health issues, from anxiety to bipolar to all sorts so this blog post would be so long to talk through all issues that will be spoken about today. But my personal experience is my depression and anxiety, also my family who have suffered with the same things. Mental health is so common but its just because people don’t talk about it, that it isn’t made a bigger thing. If more people came forward and said you know what I don’t feel great it would be so much less taboo than what it is these days. Thats why days like these will push people to talk about it and make them realise that it really isn’t that bad to get help.

Im no psychiatrist or any special mental health councillor but these are a few hints and tips on what I do to keep track of my mental health.

– Try to notice your triggers | I know that when I don’t listen to music or turn on the lights that I’m starting to get down, also when I drop something and I feel like its the end of the world, Ive realised that after these things start to happen my head starts to get foggy so as soon as I notice these things happening I start to track and write down how I feel, I also meditate a lot more just so I can become more aware of my headspace.

-Meditation| after I’ve started meditating I’m so much more aware of my headspace. Its nice to take 5 mins or so out everyday just to sit there and spend time thinking about nothing. Its so relaxing and just makes you so much more aware of how little things feel after you don’t think about them for a while.

-Take some pamper time | Just set some time away each week to pamper yourself, even if this involves just drinking a beer or glass of wine on the sofa, just set an hour aside to put some body lotion on, but a facemark on or play a video game just some time for yourself.

-Talk to people | after I spoke to people and doctors about how I was feeling I felt like a weight had been lifted. Even now when I start to feel a bit down I just say to my partner ” I’m not feeling too great ” and that just sets off the conversation just saying that. After talking I always found that it got better, because I knew it wasn’t just me on my own with it and that someone was looking out for me as well. Just as soon as you have those words out thats it.

I would love for people who have read this blog to donate today or tomorrow or whenever! Donating money can help charities to open there help lines for people to talk to people, it can help pay for a councillor to sit and chat with someone, it can also fund more research to help! So please even if you go on the site and donate £1, every little helps! There are also some chat help lines for anyone going through this at the moment, please just pick up the phone and talk!

Samaritans – Phone Number :  0117 983 1000

                         Website:    www.samaritans.org

Mind – Website : http://www.mind.org.uk

              Text : 70660       FIVE to give £5.                 THREE to give £3

Young Minds – Text : 70070           YMHY17  to give £3

I have also made a playlist that I would love you guys to look each song up and listen to it!

Warrior – Demi Lovato

Who Says – Selena Gomez

Firework – Katy Perry

Invincible – Kelly Clarkson

Praying – Kesha

Learn To Let It Go – Kesha

Rainbow – Kesha

Fight Song – Rachel Platten

Who You Are – Jessie J

Skin – Sixx : AM

Skyscraper – Demi Lovato

Love Myself – Hailee Steinfeld

Please Donate or just Talk! People talking gets a movement!

Lots of Love

Amy

xxx

 

 

 

Life Update!

Hi Guys!

Ive decided to make this blog post, instead of just jumping straight back into blogging again, I haven’t blogged for a while as you can see. After moving to Bristol I was unemployed for a while, that was half fun and half not fun, as you know if you’ve read a previous blog post of mine I’ve suffered with depression. So being home alone for 50% of the day did start to take its toll on me, even though some days I really did enjoy just chilling out and having the free time to do whatever. I ended up getting a job cleaning and I hated it , it was like my worse nightmare! It ended up setting off my depression off even more which really didn’t help. I did manage to get out of my rut and sort myself out with the help of my partner. After that I did manage to get another job, which was great at the start because it was working with my partner so we got to spend lots of time together, which we enjoy. I know that sends some couples into hating each other but were ok with spending so much time together. Its now started to be a bad job again because they won’t let us have holidays together which is obviously a problem! But jobs aside, life is good, I do get homesick a bit which I think is normal. I also really badly want to go on holiday which sucks because we can’t afford to fly off somewhere.

But basically I’m trying to find a healthy level of not being stressed at work and life to be able to blog, as I really enjoy blogging and miss it so much! Im determined to get better and get my life into a better routine of being able to do everything! I would also love to start vlogging and get my youtube channel back up but I don’t have the nerve! But I promise blogs will be back to there normal routine!

Much Love

Amy

xxx

 

Moving Away From Home

So recently about a month ago I moved away from home.

Its strange, as I always spent time at my partners parents place it felt like I was coming here to stay for a couple of weeks, but walking in after having food with my parents that night and having all of my stuff here. It was so strange! I felt like I had over packed!

The first week I went away on holiday which felt even weirder coming home and it not being home. I did cry a few times just because it was getting used to this being my home.

Before I moved I had a friend say that she was going to keep in touch with me but she hasn’t contacted me at all. I class her now as not being a friend as even when I got engaged she had nothing to say, she had always been jealous of mine and my partners relationship but at that moment in time it proved how bad it actually was. Moving away has changed my friendships quite a lot, I still know I have my two friends no matter what but friends that I thought were, weren’t and it was made clear when you move away from those people.

Moving away from family was the hardest. I had always gone out with my sister or parents and being here and having Charlie at work, I don’t have anyone to go out with so I have to go on my own. I’ve been here for a month and a half now and today was the first time I have gone out on my own. Im quite proud of myself today. But it is just getting used to not being around people all the time again. Ive become too attached to Charlie with not having a job and him being the only one around here. Now I have a job I hope it will be better but I never know with me!

Moving away from home is difficult, its coming home and not having your mum and dad there to welcome you home or have your tea ready. Its not living in the house that you’ve grown up in all those years. I love being away from home though, it has helped me and my mums relationship as we just had too much of each other.

Just remember when you leave home it is hard, But it does get easier!

Much Love

Amy

xxx